Sasusaku: Once Upon a couple Times
by PinoyHeart165
Summary: A bunch of one-shots of Sasusaku. I get my inspirations from   f m y l i f e . c o m ... rated for language and suggestive themes
1. Chapter 1: Wash and Reuse!

FML: "Today, I walked into the laundry room when my mom pulled a condom wrapper out of my pants pocket. She looked at me and said "you know you can't wash and reuse these." FML

I just got home from my girlfriend Sakura's house. We went there after school, made out, and eventually had sex again. That was a usual routine for us.

Sakura's been my girlfriend since we were freshman until now, so that's about three years. We started having sex when we had our three-year anniversary, and ever since then we've been doing it. And Kami-sama knows how much we do it a week!

So I got home, went up into my room, and started texting Sakura.

To: Sakura-chan

_Hey there sexy chick ;) today was great_

_-Saku's_Drug_

To: Sasuke-kun

_ohh, yummy ;) it was amazin cnt stop thnkin bout you 3_

_-Sexy_Saks_

Kami, the things that girl can do! "Sasuke sweetie!" I heard my mom call. I groaned at that nickname. She still calls me that?

"What mom?" I called back. "Throw down your laundry!" She replied. I sighed, and changed my jeans and shirt to some sweats. I stayed shirtless because I'm too for my shirt (or at least Sakura says so).

I tossed down my clothes from today down the stairs and my mom caught them and put them into the laundry basket. I walked back to my room and went back to texting hot messages to my girlfriend.

* * *

><p>-One hour later-<p>

"Sasuke!" I heard my mom call again. Great, now what? "Hold on!" I said, texting bye to Sakura. "_Srry babe, gtg mom callin. Love you." "Love you too Sasuke!"_

"Mom?" I called when I got downstairs. "In the laundry room Sasuke!" I heard her say back. I made my way to the laundry room when my mom pulled a condom wrapper out of my pants pocket. She looked at me and said "You know you can't wash and reuse these," she said.

I felt my whole face turn white. "Ah fuck mom!" I groaned. "What? It's not _my_ fault that you left a condom wrapper in your pocket! Really now, when your father and I were young, we-" "OKAY NO THANKS!" I yelled as I ran away from her. Seriously, the _LAST_ thing I need is to hear _ANOTHER _story about how my parents occupied their time when they were younger.

That's just wrong. I know how me and Itachi were made. I don't want the extra details.

As soon as I got in my room, I closed and locked the door and grabbed my cell phone and called Sakura. "Hey Sasuke! What's up?" I heard Sakura say. "Sakura, we kinda have a problem," I said nervously. "What? Is something wrong?" She asked frantically.

"So, my mom found a condom wrapper in my pants pocket..." I told her slowly. "WHAT? Sasuke how could you be so careless?" Sakura yelled at me. It took me a while to calm her down. After a few minutes, Sakura managed to come back down to Earth. "Are you grounded?" she asked. "I don't know, actually. Mom didn't say." I replied. "Oh, okay. Well I'm gonna go to bed. Night Sasuke. I love you." Sakura said. "Night, love you too."

* * *

><p>-The Next Day-<p>

I got back from Sakura's house and stepped into the kitchen. I saw my mom in the kitchen cooking dinner and I got nervous. "Um, hi mom," I said. Mom gave me a weird smile. "Hey sweetie. I just bought some tomatoes. They're on the counter." I looked at her suspiciously as I grabbed a tomato. "Um, thanks?" I said, arching an eyebrow.

"Welcome. Dinner will be ready soon." Mom said. I walked up the stairs finishing my tomato. What's up with mom? Well, she did find a condom wrapper in her son's pocket, but other than that everything's fine. I got into the upstairs hallway and saw Itachi, and once he saw me it looked like he was suppressing a fit of laughter. "What's your problem?" I asked him. "Mhm, oh, n-nothing Sasuke!" he said, laughing. I arched an eyebrow at him. "R-really Sasuke! G-go to your room I'll t-talk to you later!" Itachi said, running into his room.

What the hell? What's up with everyone? Anyways, I made my way to my room, closed the door, and tossed my bag who-knows where. I was so tired, and I jumped on my bed. But as I sat on my bed, I heard something. What the hell? It sounds like a wrapper. I looked around my bed, and my face turned white.

On my bed was a variety of condoms in all sizes. Near it was a note. Oh fuck. "_Dear Sasuke, don't forget that you can't reuse condoms! So I bought you a whole bunch with different sizes since I don't know how big (or small) you are! You don't want to get Sakura-chan pregnant anytime soon now, do you? Have fun! -Mom"_

I felt all the blood drain from my face. My mom. My _mom_ gave me condoms! My _mom _is basically encouraging me to have sex. With Sakura. I sighed. Then I let out a loud scream. When I was done, Itachi came into my room and started laughing. "S-Sas-uke! Mom said you can't r-reuse c-condoms!" He said in between laughs. I threw a (sharp) pencil at him yelling "GET OUT!" to him, but he only ducked as the pencil stabbed the wall. Still laughing, Itachi waved off and left.

I sighed in annoyance, then looked at the condoms again. Mom seriously bought a lot. Then a sudden, awesomesauce idea popped into my head. I smirked and grabbed my cell phone. "I'm such an idiot! Why didn't I think of this before?" I asked myself. I texted Sakura. _"Saks, I'm not grounded, but how about I come over tonight?"_ I sent the message, and five seconds later (damn that girl can text) I got a reply. _"Great! And sure, I'm missing you ;)"_

I grabbed some condoms and was out the door. God, my mom can be a pain in the ass, but in a good way.

Sometimes...

* * *

><p><em>-A couple weeks later-<em>

_"Sasuke! Do you need anymore condoms?" My mom screamed at the top of her lungs. "I'm going out to buy more! Your father and I have run out!" At hearing this, Itachi and I ran out to the hallway. "GROSS MOM!" We yelled. "Well, do you? And Itachi I'm getting you some too! You need to get laid soon," Mom said casually._

_I muttered a slight "yes" as Itachi face-palmed himself. Oh god mom._


	2. Chapter 2: Obession & Deleting Contacts

FML: "Today, my boyfriend of two years told me I was being too obsessive. This is the guy who has gone through my phone two separate times and deleted all of my male contacts. FML

-Sakura's P.O.V.-

"God Sakura, you're so obsessive!" Sasuke told me. My mouth just gaped open. "ME? OBSESSIVE? SAYS THE GUY WHO DELETED _ALL_ OF MY MALE CONTACTS ON MY PHONE!" I yelled.

I, Sakura Haruno, has been dating the _sex god_, Sasuke Uchiha, for two years already, and today he just told me that I'm too obsessive. _Just _because I text him a million times a day and I always want to hang out with him and I love seeing him shirtless!

Now he thinks that I'm too obsessive. But not every girl can have the most AWESOMESAUCE boyfriend/lover in the world!

-Sasuke's P.O.V.-

Gosh, Sakura can be so annoying sometimes. Sure, she's gotten on my nerves a couple of times before, but today was just _bad._

I slept over last night. Usually when I sleep over we (censor) like there's no tomorrow, and then we fall asleep. I usually sleep without a shirt on, and she loves it when I'm shirtless.

(Who doesn't?)

Anyways, I wake up and go to the kitchen and Sakura's downstairs texting away like a little girl while giggling. So when I ask what is she doing, she just says "Oh nothing!" So I was pretty suspicious. Later, Sakura and I went out to the mall.

As soon as we step into the mall, I get mobbed by Sakura's (female) friends calling me hot. What. The. Hell.

I ran into the guys' bathroom dragging Sakura in there with me, not giving a damn who the hell is in there(that's what she said). I pinned her against the wall, and demanded her to tell me what the hell is going on.

"Well, you're just too cute when you're sleeping, and you _were _shirtless, so I took a pic of you on my phone and sent it to my friends!" Sakura said smiling. My mouth just gaped open. And here we are to right now.

-Sakura's P.O.V.-

"Sasuke, I don't see what's wrong with sending a picture of you sleeping and shirtless to my friends! They have boyfriends!" I said. "Yeah, but that's just creepy. Even though they have boyfriends, that doesn't mean they don't think I'm not! You're so obsessed with me it's creepy..." he said.

My mouth just fell open. "Really? _I'm_ not the one who deleted _all_ the contacts of the opposite sex on _someone's_ phone! 'Hm, I wanna text Naruto! Oh wait! I CAN'T! BECAUSE SOMEONE ERASED ALL MY GUY FRIENDS' NUMBERS!'" I said sarcastically.

Sasuke just stared at me. I stuck my tongue out at him as he sighed in frustration. His arms were both at my sides, blocking me so I can't escape. I sighed. "I'm sorry," I muttered under my breath as I looked down. I could have sworn I heard him smirk at me. One of his hands came off from the wall and caressed my face as he lifted my head, making me look at him.

"It's okay. Sorry I deleted half your contacts," he said smirking. "Let's make a deal." Sasuke said. I arched an eyebrow at him. "A deal?" I asked. He nodded. "Yeah. If you promise not to send any more pictures of me to your friends, then I'll let you have your contacts back. But I have to know them." Sasuke said.

I glared at him. "What? That's not fair!" I said. "Hn. Fine. What do you want?" he asked. "I can take pictures of you on my phone, not sending them to anyone. They'll only be for my personal viewing." I said. "And, you let me have my contacts of family, all the guys you know, and five guys you don't know." I told him. "Two." he said.

I pouted. "Four!" I said, not wanting to compromise. "Three." he muttered. I thought about it, then sighed. "Fine, three." I said. "Hn," Sasuke smirked. "Just stop your pouting. It too cute," He said, leaning down and pressing his lips onto mine. I moaned into his mouth as I let his tongue slide in and dance with mine.

I felt his hand crawl up my shirt as he moved to my neck leaving love bites. Sadly, I snapped into reality and remembered that we're in a bathroom. "Mhm, Sasuke!" I said, pulling his hand away. He growled in response. "Whaaat?" He whined. I giggled at his expression. "Sweetie, we're in a bathroom." I said gently. Sasuke sighed in frustration as he grabbed my hand and locked the bathroom door, then pressed me against it.

After a (very) heated make-out/sex session in a public mens' bathroom, Sasuke and I adjusted ourselves so we looked decent enough and unlocked the door and left. As soon as we stepped outside, we saw a line of men who had to use the bathroom in front of the door, some sweating bullets, others jumping up and down. One of the guys caught our attention. A certain blonde haired blue eyes boy...

"Oi! What the hell were you guys doing in there?" Naruto said, screaming while holding his.. er, tenders... "Um," "Well, Sakura was sick so she needed to use the bathroom, but the women's bathroom is too far for her." Sasuke said. Naruto just glared at us. "BUT YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO LOCK THE DOOR!" he yelled. Sasuke and I just shrugged and went home.

-A couple hours later-

Sasuke and I were making out on the bed, and his hand was crawling up my shirt. He gave me back my contacts (despite his disliking) and things were all good. He was about to take off my shirt when...

_Ring Ring..._

_Ring Ring..._

Sasuke sighed as he rested his head on my chest. I groaned and grabbed my phone answering it. "Hello?" "Hey, Sakura. It's-" Whoever was on the other line got disconnected. Sasuke grabbed my phone and threw it across the room, causing it to hit the wall and shatter into a million pieces.

"HEY!" I yelled frustrated at Sasuke. "I'll get you a new one," Sasuke muttered as he took off my shirt.


	3. Author's note

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

** Hey guys, PinoyHeart165 here! Anyways, I'm sure some of you are familiar with my stories. You know,**

**-The Beginning of Everything**

**-Sweet Sakura**

**-Sasusaku: Roses are red, Saks is pink**

**-Sasusaku: Once Upon a couple Times**

**-Sasusaku: It Sucks when You Might be too Late**

** Anyways, I made this HUGE mistake by starting a bunch of stories and not finishing them I procrastinate a lot, so I'm sorry! I'll tell you a little synopsis of what I'm planning to do with each story.**

**-The Beginning of Everything**

** I think I'm done with this story, but I'm not satisfied with it. It's my first, so I was really awkward when it came to writing fanfics at that time. I think I'll probably leave that story where it is, untouched and them kissing.**

**-Sweet Sakura**

** Yeah, this is the story I started and I almost finished. I'm thinking about discontinuing this story because of the lack of reviews and inspirations. If I get up to it, I'll probably finish it all in one chapter, the ending and MAYBE and epilogue. But with the lack of reviews/readers, discontinuing is a big probability. So if you guys want me to finish that story, please review and give ideas!**

**-Sasusaku: Roses are red, Saks is pink**

** I wrote this last week during my spring break. I know it's pretty late, it being a Valentine's Day fanfic and all! :P Anyways, this was intentioned to be a one-shot, but SomeSecretsAreBestKeptSecret is asking for a continuation :P MAYBE PROMISE! Lol Iloveya 3**

**-Sasusaku: Once Upon a couple Times**

** This was intentioned to be a collection of my one-shots. But with the lack of time/creativity/other things (like being lazy) I'll probably update this slowly. I get my inspirations from: f mylife .com .**

**-Sasusaku: It Sucks when You Might be too Late**

** I just started this last night, I know that my first chapter was really short. I was thinking about having this story as a two-shot or maybe three-shot. I'm still not sure where this story is going, sorry!**

** Anyways, I just wanted to give you guys an author's note saying what's going on and what I'm planning on doing with my stories. I'm not gonna stop writing! I promise! I love you guys, thanks to my followers!**

**Special shout outs to(these are the people I know keep reading my stuff I love you guys! 3) :**

**-pinkypinkypinky 3 (The first to comment on Sweet Sakura!)**

**-SomeSecretsAreBestKeptSecret (I will hunt her down if she doesn't read them lol I love you!)**

**-C.A.M.E.O.1 and Only (I love her random comments they make me smile :)**

**-digzzz 3**

** I love you guys! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing! Without you guys I probably would have stopped writing a while ago, but you guys keep me going! **

** Love,**

** PinoyHeart165**


End file.
